Hey Guys!
So I am procrastinating and I figure, why not let you guys get to know me a little more :P Here is my first TAG
1. Do you have a middle name?
No, I actually don't have a middle name, but if I did, I would want it to be my unofficial
Chinese name
2. What's your favorite subject in school?
Anything anatomy/physiology related
3. What's your favorite drink?
Tea, especially green tea, hot or cold
4. What is your favorite song at the moment?
What you wanted by One Republic, TFiOS trailer!
5. What would you name your children?
I would name my daughter Ashley and my son Nathan
6. Do you participate in any sports?
Nope, but I do love to bike and I did try out for my high school touch football team and was
almost the quarterback.
7. What's your favorite book?
The Fault in Our Stars, also really loving the Bloodlines series (spin off to Vampire Academy)
8. What's your favorite color?
Purple!
9. What's your favorite animal?
Probably ravens, they are such a amazing shade of black and they gt to fly everywhere!
10. What's your favorite perfume?
I don't generally wear perfume, but the one I always go to is Lovestruck by Vera Wang
11. What is your favorite holiday?
Christmas, not only to I get to spend time with family, but I also get time off school!
12. Have you graduated form High School?
Yup!
13. Have you been out of your country?
Yes, I've been to the US, Mexico, Jamaica and Grand Cayman
14. Do you speak any other languages?
Yes, I am fluent in English, et en francais, and I can also speak 2 types of Chinese: Toisanese and
Cantonese
15. Do you have any siblings?
Yup, 2 little brothers
16. What's your favorite store?
Probably the Bay, I know old people store, but you can get really good brand name stuff for
great prices there!
17. What's your favorite restaurant?
Just cause I'm craving Korean right now, it would have to be a little restaurant called
GaNaDaRa
18. Do you like school?
Want to say no, cause it's exam times, but I have to admit, I do like school!
19. Who are your favorite YouTubers?
So they are all asian... but Frmheadtotoe, Bubzbeauty, WongFu and Blogilates
20. What's your favorite movie?
Any Disney Princess movie, if I had to choose one, it would probably be Little Mermaid
21. What is your favorite TV show?
Right now MasterChef (Canada or US) and my guilty pleasure Disney show is Austin & Ally
22. PC or Mac?
PC all the way!
23. What phone do you have?
Samsung Galaxy S4
24. How tall are you?
I'm 5'4 and 3/4 so I generally tell people I'm 5'5
25. Any pets?
I've never had a pet :( but I would really want a small house dog
So that is it, I hope you guys enjoyed getting to know me a little better :D Blog to you guys soon!
-J
Thursday, April 24, 2014
Friday, March 28, 2014
Excitement
Hey guys!
So I know I haven't been updating lately at all but I've basically been busy and not very motivated to post about anything in particular, but I this time I am excited, and why you may ask? Because I have spent the last few month worried about a lot of things, including life after my undergrad and my summer and work experience and all that jazz. But some of the things are starting to come together and hopefully they will stay this way. But basically I was worried about work and getting experience in my field.
I was worried that I would have no experience and I would still not know where I would be headed by the end of this summer especially cause I would be applying to grad school next yea. And I was torn between going back to work where I work and doing something that is related to my field.
In the end I decided that I was going to go back to work cause hey, money and I like people I work with and do volunteering on the side. I had applied to volunteering and I had also applied to a lab position, my GPA isn't very great right now so I obviously got rejected from the lab, but the volunteering got through, and to be honest the volunteering was extremely last minute, but apparently, my boss gave me a kick ass reference. So so far, my summer will be working and then volunteering which I would love because I have realized hat I can't work in a lab, it would kill me to sit and stare at bacteria for a few hours a day. I want to work with people and this volunteering opportunity will give me an amazing chance to see if it is really what I want first hand.
On the side of work, I think it will be a good season too. I love the management team that we have been putting together and I think that the team will work very well. I am also getting people in and I think they would be great additions to the team. I am also working on getting a car, and that would make so many things this summer so easily.
I am also going to be going on a trip right after finals to NYC! With my grandparents, but the important part is that I still get to travel and get way for a little bit. I'm excited because I will be seeing some of the family that I didn't get to see this summer because of work and I will also be able to go back to NYC where I feel like everything is just so different (maybe cause I've had a good experience the last 2 times I was there).
And finally, I applied to a undergraduate TA position for next fall and so far things are looking good on that front, I have a good reference form two TAs and I did very well in the class. It would be a paid Ta position and it would also be done with a friend of mine! Interviews will be in May, so I'm really looking forward to that :D
Well that is why I am so excited. I'm basically on tract to most of the things I wanted to get done in the next year or so. Obviously there is more, but so far this is all coming together and I am getting very excited. The only thing left is a trip down south or to a cruise. The other major thing I would want to do is to go to Hong Kong in December :D
-J
So I know I haven't been updating lately at all but I've basically been busy and not very motivated to post about anything in particular, but I this time I am excited, and why you may ask? Because I have spent the last few month worried about a lot of things, including life after my undergrad and my summer and work experience and all that jazz. But some of the things are starting to come together and hopefully they will stay this way. But basically I was worried about work and getting experience in my field.
I was worried that I would have no experience and I would still not know where I would be headed by the end of this summer especially cause I would be applying to grad school next yea. And I was torn between going back to work where I work and doing something that is related to my field.
In the end I decided that I was going to go back to work cause hey, money and I like people I work with and do volunteering on the side. I had applied to volunteering and I had also applied to a lab position, my GPA isn't very great right now so I obviously got rejected from the lab, but the volunteering got through, and to be honest the volunteering was extremely last minute, but apparently, my boss gave me a kick ass reference. So so far, my summer will be working and then volunteering which I would love because I have realized hat I can't work in a lab, it would kill me to sit and stare at bacteria for a few hours a day. I want to work with people and this volunteering opportunity will give me an amazing chance to see if it is really what I want first hand.
On the side of work, I think it will be a good season too. I love the management team that we have been putting together and I think that the team will work very well. I am also getting people in and I think they would be great additions to the team. I am also working on getting a car, and that would make so many things this summer so easily.
I am also going to be going on a trip right after finals to NYC! With my grandparents, but the important part is that I still get to travel and get way for a little bit. I'm excited because I will be seeing some of the family that I didn't get to see this summer because of work and I will also be able to go back to NYC where I feel like everything is just so different (maybe cause I've had a good experience the last 2 times I was there).
And finally, I applied to a undergraduate TA position for next fall and so far things are looking good on that front, I have a good reference form two TAs and I did very well in the class. It would be a paid Ta position and it would also be done with a friend of mine! Interviews will be in May, so I'm really looking forward to that :D
Well that is why I am so excited. I'm basically on tract to most of the things I wanted to get done in the next year or so. Obviously there is more, but so far this is all coming together and I am getting very excited. The only thing left is a trip down south or to a cruise. The other major thing I would want to do is to go to Hong Kong in December :D
-J
Tuesday, March 11, 2014
What is on the Other Side of This Mountain?
Hey guys!
So as you guys may know, I have been very stressed about my future lately. I am currently a U2 student, which means that I will be graduating next semester and then, well... life happens. Not that life hasn't already started, but I think you guys know what I mean, like a real job, getting your own place to live and all that stuff. Hopefully I can still bum at my parents place for, maybe forever :P but it is scary.
Right now I am looking for something a little more in my field, which for those of you who don't know it is in the science field, more on the cell biology/anatomy/pharmacology side of science and it is getting a little tricky. Some of you might know that I failed a class previously, and if I actually never mentioned that, then yes, I have failed a class before and it took one hell of a bite out of my GPA. But it's getting tricky because I failed that class and cause of that my GPA sucks, plus I have no lab experience, so good luck to me to finding a job in my own field when I am competing with people with amazing GPAs and people that are ultra competitive because they want to get into med school.
I emailed a lab recently to ask for a position they were offering and the response was basically, you are not a competitive enough candidate due to your GPA, you would to be very successful because we are looking for someone who is competitive enough to be able to win an award. Obviously worded nicer than that, to be honest, I would have preferred to not have had a response, it would have been less of a punch in the face.
I'm worried because it is hard to get into a lab, they expect you to have experience and to have an amazing GPA, and I just don't have either. But let's face it, not everyone is a 4.0 super decorated GPA 21 year old. But it is the career path I chose, so I guess I have to suck it up and hope for the best right?
I know not many labs will take people like me because we are seen as the slackers and the ones that can't win awards, but how would they know? They look at one thing and that is what they judge you with, but not all hardworking people get the best results (although in this case it is the truth) but some people fall into the cracks and we all fail at some point in our lives, we don't always get what we get. So it is hard, and to be honest, if I was hiring someone I would judge based on the same criteria. But at the same time, I'm 21, and I'm trying to figure out my life, what do I like? what do I want? How do I know, I haven't even lived for that long yet!
It's hard though, seeing people you know get amazing grades, or get amazing job/school opportunities and here I am, wandering around, dragging my feet while so many people around me are achieving greatness. Some are more humble about it than others and some aren't happy with what they have, but I can guarantee you that if you were in my shoes looking at you, you would be happier in your position than in mine. Although I love my current job, it's not something that is going to lead me anywhere in life. If I were in business it would be an amazing thing for me now, I recently recruited people for this years wave of employees and I have experience in employee training and management, but does any of that count in my field? Not that I have seen so far. I'm not complaining though, thanks to this job i have made friends with people that I have never expected to make friends with and I have gotten the chance to get out of my shell and stand up for myself when I need to. I was one hell of an unconfident girl before this job (not that I am that much better now, but the me 4 years ago and the me now is a totally different girl). But it is still hard to look at what everyone else is accomplishing and look at what I am accomplishing. I mean one of my old TA's who is a year or two older than me, just got accepted into a PhD program at the University of Oxford in a program that only accepts 5 people annually, she's worked at 6 labs already and she has TA'd, she has also been in arts programs and she also teaches herself to play an amazing array of instruments and she finds time to have fun and kick ass. How do people have so much talent (not to mention time)?!
No, I am not jealous of her, in fact, I think she deserves it, she is amazingly humble and she is amazingly talented and I think this is something she deserves because she has that drive and that passion in her that a a lot of people in this day and age and not to mention, people in science, don't have. She is genuinely nice and humble and in my mind, she deserves this opportunity more than any other science student I know.
But once again, it gets scary to see people around me accomplish such amazing things, while I still feel like a fish floating around, going nowhere, or trying to get somewhere but end up swimming in circles coming back to the same thing over and over again. I've thought of career paths in the future, but none of them necessarily feel right or seem right, and I'm worried that by the time I get to the top of this mountain, I won't like what I see on the other side, or worse, find out that it's a cliff with nothing but a void on the other side.
-J
So as you guys may know, I have been very stressed about my future lately. I am currently a U2 student, which means that I will be graduating next semester and then, well... life happens. Not that life hasn't already started, but I think you guys know what I mean, like a real job, getting your own place to live and all that stuff. Hopefully I can still bum at my parents place for, maybe forever :P but it is scary.
Right now I am looking for something a little more in my field, which for those of you who don't know it is in the science field, more on the cell biology/anatomy/pharmacology side of science and it is getting a little tricky. Some of you might know that I failed a class previously, and if I actually never mentioned that, then yes, I have failed a class before and it took one hell of a bite out of my GPA. But it's getting tricky because I failed that class and cause of that my GPA sucks, plus I have no lab experience, so good luck to me to finding a job in my own field when I am competing with people with amazing GPAs and people that are ultra competitive because they want to get into med school.
I emailed a lab recently to ask for a position they were offering and the response was basically, you are not a competitive enough candidate due to your GPA, you would to be very successful because we are looking for someone who is competitive enough to be able to win an award. Obviously worded nicer than that, to be honest, I would have preferred to not have had a response, it would have been less of a punch in the face.
I'm worried because it is hard to get into a lab, they expect you to have experience and to have an amazing GPA, and I just don't have either. But let's face it, not everyone is a 4.0 super decorated GPA 21 year old. But it is the career path I chose, so I guess I have to suck it up and hope for the best right?
I know not many labs will take people like me because we are seen as the slackers and the ones that can't win awards, but how would they know? They look at one thing and that is what they judge you with, but not all hardworking people get the best results (although in this case it is the truth) but some people fall into the cracks and we all fail at some point in our lives, we don't always get what we get. So it is hard, and to be honest, if I was hiring someone I would judge based on the same criteria. But at the same time, I'm 21, and I'm trying to figure out my life, what do I like? what do I want? How do I know, I haven't even lived for that long yet!
It's hard though, seeing people you know get amazing grades, or get amazing job/school opportunities and here I am, wandering around, dragging my feet while so many people around me are achieving greatness. Some are more humble about it than others and some aren't happy with what they have, but I can guarantee you that if you were in my shoes looking at you, you would be happier in your position than in mine. Although I love my current job, it's not something that is going to lead me anywhere in life. If I were in business it would be an amazing thing for me now, I recently recruited people for this years wave of employees and I have experience in employee training and management, but does any of that count in my field? Not that I have seen so far. I'm not complaining though, thanks to this job i have made friends with people that I have never expected to make friends with and I have gotten the chance to get out of my shell and stand up for myself when I need to. I was one hell of an unconfident girl before this job (not that I am that much better now, but the me 4 years ago and the me now is a totally different girl). But it is still hard to look at what everyone else is accomplishing and look at what I am accomplishing. I mean one of my old TA's who is a year or two older than me, just got accepted into a PhD program at the University of Oxford in a program that only accepts 5 people annually, she's worked at 6 labs already and she has TA'd, she has also been in arts programs and she also teaches herself to play an amazing array of instruments and she finds time to have fun and kick ass. How do people have so much talent (not to mention time)?!
No, I am not jealous of her, in fact, I think she deserves it, she is amazingly humble and she is amazingly talented and I think this is something she deserves because she has that drive and that passion in her that a a lot of people in this day and age and not to mention, people in science, don't have. She is genuinely nice and humble and in my mind, she deserves this opportunity more than any other science student I know.
But once again, it gets scary to see people around me accomplish such amazing things, while I still feel like a fish floating around, going nowhere, or trying to get somewhere but end up swimming in circles coming back to the same thing over and over again. I've thought of career paths in the future, but none of them necessarily feel right or seem right, and I'm worried that by the time I get to the top of this mountain, I won't like what I see on the other side, or worse, find out that it's a cliff with nothing but a void on the other side.
-J
Sunday, February 23, 2014
Will It Ever Happen?
Hey guys,
Lately I've been feeling bummed about quite a bunch of things, which really doesn't make sense because I am doing great in school so far (generally I only pick myself up around finals and do really well then). My friends are all there supporting me and I'm not fighting with any of them, I finished all my midterms and I'm just waiting for spring break to roll around.... There's really no reason for me to feel so down.
But lately, I have been wondering if one day I will find my Prince Charming. I really don't know why I feel this way lately, it's not like any of my close friends just got into a relationship or got engaged or married or anything. On the contrary, the only relationship related things that have happened within my close circle is really something that should not be celebrated at all. But nonetheless, I still feel like I will be, in terms of a better term... Forever alone. I guess there is a combination of factors that are involved, and surprisingly, Valentine's Day wasn't one of the factors, I actually enjoyed seeing all the guys walk around with bouquets or roses and present, and seeing people get serenaded in public is always a bonus.
I guess it's cause lately I've been very subconscious about the way I look and the way I come across to guys. I've always been very conscious about the way I look, let's face it, I'm not skinny, nowhere close, I'm on the overweight side and I know it. I don't have good skin and I have white hair that I have to constantly dye, all of that doesn't exactly add up to confidence. I've tried eating healthier and results take time so it is not the easiest time, I have been changing and adding to my skin routine to see what works and it is helping, but when stress comes around, there is nothing that can help my skin. I've tried masks, mint teas, changing my facewash/toner/moisturizer and none of them really make a difference. I also try exercising, and I will admit that I am guilty of not being good at keeping with a workout routine. Although I did sign up for Color Me Rad... so I have to start training, and stat!
Now I know that a real guy will like you for what's on the inside and not what's on the outside, but it would be amazing to be able to feel comfortable in my skin and not be self conscious all the time about the way I look or if my skin is looking especially troll like that particular day.
It would also help if I had more male friends, but unfortunately most of my friends aren't into the whole let's get to know someone other than girls thing.... unless it's a guy from a bar that is, and that kind of limits the people I get to meet and the people I hang out with, especially when one of the friends I'm always with goes completely mute when I'm around some of my guy friends.... which doesn't make it pleasant for anyone.
I guess I'm at an age where people always ask if I'm dating and it is making me super self conscious. Or maybe it's because a lot of people I know are in a relationship, or are always going out on dates, and I can count the amount of times I have been on a date with one hand, well maybe 2, I don't even know, but it leads to some worrying.
And with friends that always somehow look amazing and are normal weight, and too many of my friends that are underweight, I just feel like it's hard to catch a guys attention when you have a little blob walking next to someone that looks like what society expects a girl to look like.
I also have a tendency to be too friendly with people, and for this reason, completely throw people into the friendzone without knowing it... there are just so many things with me that are wrong for building relationships with guys that sometimes I think I'll never find someone. Yes, I talk to guys a lot and I can joke around with them about stuff, but that is not the same as being interested in someone and it sure as hell doesn't mean that they will be interested in me. If only life where like that...
Anyways, I am sorry for this ridiculous rant that probably doesn't even make any sense, but it's on my mind for a while and it's been bumming me out so much,
-J
Lately I've been feeling bummed about quite a bunch of things, which really doesn't make sense because I am doing great in school so far (generally I only pick myself up around finals and do really well then). My friends are all there supporting me and I'm not fighting with any of them, I finished all my midterms and I'm just waiting for spring break to roll around.... There's really no reason for me to feel so down.
But lately, I have been wondering if one day I will find my Prince Charming. I really don't know why I feel this way lately, it's not like any of my close friends just got into a relationship or got engaged or married or anything. On the contrary, the only relationship related things that have happened within my close circle is really something that should not be celebrated at all. But nonetheless, I still feel like I will be, in terms of a better term... Forever alone. I guess there is a combination of factors that are involved, and surprisingly, Valentine's Day wasn't one of the factors, I actually enjoyed seeing all the guys walk around with bouquets or roses and present, and seeing people get serenaded in public is always a bonus.
I guess it's cause lately I've been very subconscious about the way I look and the way I come across to guys. I've always been very conscious about the way I look, let's face it, I'm not skinny, nowhere close, I'm on the overweight side and I know it. I don't have good skin and I have white hair that I have to constantly dye, all of that doesn't exactly add up to confidence. I've tried eating healthier and results take time so it is not the easiest time, I have been changing and adding to my skin routine to see what works and it is helping, but when stress comes around, there is nothing that can help my skin. I've tried masks, mint teas, changing my facewash/toner/moisturizer and none of them really make a difference. I also try exercising, and I will admit that I am guilty of not being good at keeping with a workout routine. Although I did sign up for Color Me Rad... so I have to start training, and stat!
Now I know that a real guy will like you for what's on the inside and not what's on the outside, but it would be amazing to be able to feel comfortable in my skin and not be self conscious all the time about the way I look or if my skin is looking especially troll like that particular day.
It would also help if I had more male friends, but unfortunately most of my friends aren't into the whole let's get to know someone other than girls thing.... unless it's a guy from a bar that is, and that kind of limits the people I get to meet and the people I hang out with, especially when one of the friends I'm always with goes completely mute when I'm around some of my guy friends.... which doesn't make it pleasant for anyone.
I guess I'm at an age where people always ask if I'm dating and it is making me super self conscious. Or maybe it's because a lot of people I know are in a relationship, or are always going out on dates, and I can count the amount of times I have been on a date with one hand, well maybe 2, I don't even know, but it leads to some worrying.
And with friends that always somehow look amazing and are normal weight, and too many of my friends that are underweight, I just feel like it's hard to catch a guys attention when you have a little blob walking next to someone that looks like what society expects a girl to look like.
I also have a tendency to be too friendly with people, and for this reason, completely throw people into the friendzone without knowing it... there are just so many things with me that are wrong for building relationships with guys that sometimes I think I'll never find someone. Yes, I talk to guys a lot and I can joke around with them about stuff, but that is not the same as being interested in someone and it sure as hell doesn't mean that they will be interested in me. If only life where like that...
Anyways, I am sorry for this ridiculous rant that probably doesn't even make any sense, but it's on my mind for a while and it's been bumming me out so much,
-J
Saturday, January 11, 2014
Observations
Lately I feel like a lot of my friends have been becoming more and more, I'm not sure how to put it, it isn't selfish or self-centered... but at the same time it kind of is. They have become a lot more self-orientated. Maybe they have always been that way and I just never noticed, but I've started seeing it lately. Maybe it is just because of the specific time in our lives where we want to find out what we want to do in our futures, but at the same time I think it might be something a little more. Although Marx believed that human nature is altruistic and not selfish, I don't always believe that. I think that we are all capable of being selfish, and deep down we all care about our own survival a lot. But this isn't a sociology class, so let me get back to my point. I've started noticing that a lot of my friends aren't as unselfish or as open minded as I once believed. Now I'm not saying that they are people walking around with tunnel vision, and I am also not saying that I am the most open minded, unselfish person out there, I'm far from it, but this is just based on observations that I've been making.
I've noticed that I have friends who will only focus on what will get them ahead, whether in education or at work. They get rid of people who they deem to be "useless" to their ultimate goal and they try their hardest to build the right bridges, but are quick to burn them as they built ones that are more useful to their goal.
Some have also become concerned with protecting their little bubble, they will not be bothered with anything that is not within their spectrum and do not seem opened to ideas that are beyond their system of belief. They won't go out of their way to understand something, nor will they go out of their way to see if a close one is dealing with something in their personal life. They are content with sitting in the serenity of their bubble to the point where anything that does not affect them and only them is none of their concern.
I also have friends who believe that everyone is out to get them and to make them fail at their current task. Maybe a form of paranoia, but they go as far as to believe that even close friends and family are setting them up for failure and only want to see them fail and they will automatically hate anyone that they see in this way.
I've also noticed people who refuse to be open to ideas beyond what they deem to be right and wrong and they reject anyone who they see as different from what they believe the way people should act and look. They will not even give people a chance depending on what the person does or who the person is with and automatically deems them as something that is not worth getting to know.
And I've noticed that a lot of my friends don't bother going beyond the surface before they tag someone with a certain tag and not try to get beyond the tag to see if it is true. I'm not saying that I'm not superficial when it comes to tagging people too, but I feel like my friends tag people as "hot", "weird", "freak" but don't want to go deeper than that to see what the person is actually like. They refuse to allow the illusion that they have put on the person be broken by anyone but themselves and even when they are broken, it is broken superficially, without getting to know the person.
Now, I'm not saying all of my friends are this way, nor am I saying that I am not like this. I believe we all have this in us and that we are all capable of selfish acts, but I've noticed these things in a lot of my friends and it has given me a different view of them. It hasn't changed how I feel about my friends, because I still love them in their own weird way. But it has made me question if I am the same way, or why I haven;t noticed it in them previously.
I guess in a way I'm tired of my friends seeming like they think the world only encompasses themselves, and thinking only of themselves or living in imagined worlds. Sometimes it gets painful to see, and I'll admit at times it gets annoying. Especially when my friends tag guys as a title and then lives everyday as if the image that they portrayed on the guy is true, when in fact they know nothing about the guy. I guess I just wish everyone was just a little more open minded, I feel like this way there would be a lot less conflict and there would also be a lot more room for understanding one another.
Sorry about this weird post, it's just something that's been on my mind for a while
-J
I've noticed that I have friends who will only focus on what will get them ahead, whether in education or at work. They get rid of people who they deem to be "useless" to their ultimate goal and they try their hardest to build the right bridges, but are quick to burn them as they built ones that are more useful to their goal.
Some have also become concerned with protecting their little bubble, they will not be bothered with anything that is not within their spectrum and do not seem opened to ideas that are beyond their system of belief. They won't go out of their way to understand something, nor will they go out of their way to see if a close one is dealing with something in their personal life. They are content with sitting in the serenity of their bubble to the point where anything that does not affect them and only them is none of their concern.
I also have friends who believe that everyone is out to get them and to make them fail at their current task. Maybe a form of paranoia, but they go as far as to believe that even close friends and family are setting them up for failure and only want to see them fail and they will automatically hate anyone that they see in this way.
I've also noticed people who refuse to be open to ideas beyond what they deem to be right and wrong and they reject anyone who they see as different from what they believe the way people should act and look. They will not even give people a chance depending on what the person does or who the person is with and automatically deems them as something that is not worth getting to know.
And I've noticed that a lot of my friends don't bother going beyond the surface before they tag someone with a certain tag and not try to get beyond the tag to see if it is true. I'm not saying that I'm not superficial when it comes to tagging people too, but I feel like my friends tag people as "hot", "weird", "freak" but don't want to go deeper than that to see what the person is actually like. They refuse to allow the illusion that they have put on the person be broken by anyone but themselves and even when they are broken, it is broken superficially, without getting to know the person.
Now, I'm not saying all of my friends are this way, nor am I saying that I am not like this. I believe we all have this in us and that we are all capable of selfish acts, but I've noticed these things in a lot of my friends and it has given me a different view of them. It hasn't changed how I feel about my friends, because I still love them in their own weird way. But it has made me question if I am the same way, or why I haven;t noticed it in them previously.
I guess in a way I'm tired of my friends seeming like they think the world only encompasses themselves, and thinking only of themselves or living in imagined worlds. Sometimes it gets painful to see, and I'll admit at times it gets annoying. Especially when my friends tag guys as a title and then lives everyday as if the image that they portrayed on the guy is true, when in fact they know nothing about the guy. I guess I just wish everyone was just a little more open minded, I feel like this way there would be a lot less conflict and there would also be a lot more room for understanding one another.
Sorry about this weird post, it's just something that's been on my mind for a while
-J
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
So it's a new Year meaning that it's that time of year when we all make resolutions that we almost never ever keep and then we feel bad about them at the end of the year, but I thought of not making any new years resolutions this year, I want to make a commitment to myself and not just because it is a new year. There will be no deadline and there will be no end product. But it is basically a new years resolutions, but in a different form, cause most of us know what we don't end up keeping out resolutions for long.
This year, I want to get into shape (like every other year), but I really want to do it this year. And that is why I'm not really setting a goal, I want myself to be motivated to make a change in my life and not force myself to. I also want to be more confident in myself, this one can't really have a deadline I guess, but I've been more and more confident in the past years and I would like that to continue in the years to come.
I also want to find more time for myself, I want to write more and draw/paint more this year. I've realized that I get my ideas together a lot more when I'm writing compared to when I'm talking to someone. I also tend to be more honest when I'm writing. I want to start drawing/painting again because I kind of get lost in my own world when I do (same for when I write). I just focus on what I'm doing at that time and it gets me away from what I'm stressed about.
Besides New Years stuff, I figure since I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, I would do a 10 things about J (so that would be 50 in total I guess, the first 40 can be found here and here).
Hope 2014 will be kind to all of us and we will have a year that is more amazing than the last ;)
-J
This year, I want to get into shape (like every other year), but I really want to do it this year. And that is why I'm not really setting a goal, I want myself to be motivated to make a change in my life and not force myself to. I also want to be more confident in myself, this one can't really have a deadline I guess, but I've been more and more confident in the past years and I would like that to continue in the years to come.
I also want to find more time for myself, I want to write more and draw/paint more this year. I've realized that I get my ideas together a lot more when I'm writing compared to when I'm talking to someone. I also tend to be more honest when I'm writing. I want to start drawing/painting again because I kind of get lost in my own world when I do (same for when I write). I just focus on what I'm doing at that time and it gets me away from what I'm stressed about.
Besides New Years stuff, I figure since I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, I would do a 10 things about J (so that would be 50 in total I guess, the first 40 can be found here and here).
- I get jealous really easily
- I wish I was more artistic
- My close circle of friends doesn't change much, but my friends always come and go
- I always think of the what ifs
- I'm my own biggest obstacle
- I have issues with closure cause I'm afraid of losing someone for good. I like to believe that everyone deserves a second chance
- I have two brothers
- I get paranoid really easily
- I love playing around with makeup, but I feel uncomfortable wearing it
- I'm a lot more selfish than people think
Hope 2014 will be kind to all of us and we will have a year that is more amazing than the last ;)
-J
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